The Stupid. It Burns!

Via TCW, I read this from Zach Colman who writes for the Michigan State University student run newspaper, Statenews.com. I don't know how many comments this idiot usually gets, but this column got A LOT. A few favorites:

Zach wrote: "I cannot drive my car on the sidewalk, so why must you ride your bicycle where I drive?"

"Dumb as D. Bobby" pointed out (complete with link) that the MSU biking regulations state: " .. Since bicycles aren’t legally allowed to ride sidewalks on campus .."

Zach wrote: "But roads are for cars, not bicyclists. The bicyclist should not have been in the car lane."

"Michael" pointed out that the Michigan Vehicle Code states: "Each person riding a bicycle, electric personal assistive mobility device, or moped or operating a low-speed vehicle upon a roadway has all of the rights and is subject to all of the duties applicable to the driver of a vehicle by this chapter".

I won't even point out how stupid it is for Zach to use Lance Armstrong's average speed in the Tour de France as a cycling speed benchmark (I'm sure some commenter did).

It was the third paragraph which set the tone for the burning stupid which followed. Zach wrote: "But you see, with all these things I can do in my car nowadays, such as choose a different song on my iPod, send a text message while driving or fall asleep at the wheel because I had to wake up for a worthless 8 a.m. biology lab, I might not notice you."

OK. Zach. You are obviously too stupid to drive. Your column demonstrates that you are a failure as a journalist. Your attitude towards Biology demonstrates that any career involving Science is probably not in your future. Science also involves research, something for which you obviously lack motivation and/or ability. Judgment seems to be a problem for you based on your self-assessment of how you drive. That's going to narrow your field of study and career choices even further.

So what's left?

Inmate?